"I tell you what. The thirst never quenches itself. It never goes away. You just have to find some other part of your life to replace it with. I tried to quit drinking for 7 years. Tried three rehab programs. They never worked..... Always seemed to find myself bored in the end, and I'd go back. The only thing that saved me was my wife, but I didn't know she was my wife yet. I met her at another AA meeting, and she had been clean for three years. The only reason she kept going was to remind herself why she quit in the first place. She was tired of being a slave."
Lane held Chelsea's hand.
He was on a five day streak of no cocaine; withdrawal was a bitch as usual. When they went out for a lunch the other day, he ended up telling her, and he told her everything; how it started, and how he wanted to be finished with it. Then, Lane told her that he loved her, and that he needed her more than anything in the world, more than he needed the drug itself. She agreed to go to an AA meeting (even though he really should have joined a NA group instead).
Seeing him struggle, Chelsea said, "Lane, listen to these people. You just started.. you still have a chance. I will be with you the whole journey. I will do whatever it takes. You always have me. Anytime you ever want to use, I need you to call me. I can take care of you and I will especially be good at controlling your urges."
"That means more than you know. Thank you. Thank you for helping me," Said Lane. He knew that he stood a chance at quitting.
The AA meeting ended at 6:00 pm and Lane set out into the streets of downtown with Chelsea. His withdrawal symptoms were killing him. Absolutely killing him. But they seemed to be more like symptoms of the flu. "Maybe it is the flu... Maybe its the drugs. Maybe both," Lane thought. "Chelsea," Said Lane.
"I need to go home. I need a bed. I think I'm going to be really sick."
"Do you want me to call a cab or do you think you can manage the walk?"
"I can walk. Our apartment isn't too far away."
It felt weird to him to call it their apartment. Lane's apartment for years had been his only place to be alone. He lived a bachelor lifestyle out of that apartment, filled with work, booze, broads, and as of late, cocaine. And it surprised him. He couldn't have been happier that Chelsea was moving in.
"Woah, that's so cool!" Chelsea said.
"You see all that glitter?"
"Yeah. I do.... its everywhere. I kind of like it. Funny thing is that its never going to go away!"
As Chelsea walked beside him, Lane stopped her. He saw something in this distance. He proceeded to run over to a large silver pile of glitter. Kids had already been playing in it, and it must have been much bigger earlier in the day. Lane grabbed a handful, and as Chelsea approached, he threw it over her head. Then he watched it fall, and he watched it glitter. And he watched her smile.
"You couldn't be more beautiful," Said Lane.
Chelsea laughed, and blushed slightly.
"Lets get you home buddy," She said.
They walked up the stairs to lane's apartment, and on the way up, they smelled something. Something very strong was coming from someones apartment.
"Damn! I didn't know Snoop Dogg was living her now!" Lane said. Chelsea laughed.
For a moment, he was feeling better. Some of the symptoms had lifted momentarily, but still, he felt like shit. Like flu shit. But cocaine wasn't on his mind."
"Damnit!" Someone shouted from inside the room. A man emerged, reeking of marijuana. His eyes were as red as Chelsea's lips.
"Sorry for the smell dog," Said the man.
Lane laughed. "How are you doing Legs!"
"Why'd you call him legs?" Said Chelsea.
"Long story, and it would probably bore you. One time.... Never mind. Its a weed joke anyway. I've got to go get some fried chicken from K-Roger's," Legs interrupted.
"Well... I have some fried Chicken in my pad actually. This is my girlfriend Chelsea. We don't have any evening plans, and well, I am not feeling too hot. I'd love a pick me up," Said Lane.
"Do you two know each other?" Said Chelsea.
"Yeah, I met legs the first day I moved into this apartment building. I have never met a man that can out smoke my buddy legs here," Lane Said.
They enjoyed a wonderful Chicken dinner, and afterwards, Chelsea and Lane watched a movie called "The Shining."
Curled up on the couch with Chelsea, lane practically passed out. Withdrawals made him so tired. He felt like he couldn't do anything without cocaine.
Right before he fell asleep, Lane pulled Chelsea in to tell her something.
"That chicken was too good."